Short jokes
Cannibal eats missionary, gets a taste for religion.
If you tell a girl they're pretty, they won't believe you. If you tell them they're ugly, they'll never forget it.
Elephants never forget.
What's the best part about having emo grass?
It cuts itself!
If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. After all, they are independent and need no man.
Cheer on the rapist if you want.
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
How do trees calculate square roots? They use log-arithms.
What's the difference between Donald Trump and a dirty diaper?
Answer: none, they're both self-absorbed and full of sh*t!
What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister?
You better not lay a finger on her!
Trust your calculator. It's something to count on.
When you have a bladder infection,
You're in trouble. 😜
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
Hell in Greek times was known as cold and misty... so now just look at Seattle.
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he doesn't know if he is black or white.
In Portuguese, "Trumpa" means bullshit.
Can a match box? No, but a tin can.
I'd like to relish the fact that you've mustered up the courage to ketchup to my level.
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.
Where are the best shooting ranges in America?
Used to be in schools, but now in subways.