Short jokes
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.
Teacher: "I'll call your mother."
Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."
What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?
They wait to be filled with a big load.
If you eat her out on her period, does that make you Cunt Dracula?
It was just a prank, and stop calling our humor "plane." In our opinion, it's fire.
When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?
I don’t see why emo kids don’t like to hang around.
I see them hang all day.
It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*
I wish that people would stop mailing jokes about Kobe Bryant. Guys, all they do is crash and burn!
What is the difference between a dwarf and a midget?
Very little.
Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.
Uh, six teachers are annoying. Thank God I am not getting picked on at school or on this website.
Control tower to Boeing 747, you're clear to land on (said person)'s forehead.
When rejected:
That's ok, the 3 other little pigs said no, too.
What do you do when you see a spaceman?
Park in it, man!
A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."
Q: What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said to Courtney Love before he died?
A: “Holes gonna be big.”
The average French car has 7 gears, 6 of which are in reverse mode just in case the Germans come back.
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
What's the difference between an ugly monster and you?
Nothing.