Short jokes
Q: How do you make a pool table laugh?
A: Tickle its balls.
Why was the boy crying?
He had a frog stapled to his face.
An old lady walks into an adoption center, and the lady that runs the business says, "Oh, haven’t seen you in a long time!"
The only time rape jokes are okay; is when they aren't forced.
People told Kobe to fly high. Look what happened.
A miscarriage always brings the child out in me.
I had a goldfish that could break dance on the carpet... but only for, like, twenty seconds and only once.
Bin Laden promised 76 virgins to Al-Qaeda.
Instead, there was one 76-year-old virgin.
Why can’t you kidnap an orphan?
Because you can’t steal what was never wanted in the first place.
If you bet on Russian roulette, even if you win, you still lose.
What do you call a woman with three boobs? Tres leches.
What’d the fox say when he was asked to describe his wife?
“Hottie hottie hottie hoe!”
My old platoon sergeant always told me the hardest thing when walking through a field of dead babies was... his cock.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
This one kid I knew had Down syndrome, and he turned a mirror upside down trying to get rid of it.
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
Nobody:
Michael Jackson: giving kids a free cream pie.
Why did the feminist kill herself?
Because she was TRIGGERED.
A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
I hate snow. It's white and on my land.