Short jokes
What do you call a cow eating grass?
A Lawn Moo-er.
What is the highest number?
420.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pencil?
One of them has a POINT:)
What did the racist serial killer say to the cop?
“Wait, you’re getting paid?”
I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.
Your forehead is so big, it's a $20 taxi ride from your hairline to your eyebrows.
If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..
I would like to say Hitler gave two fucks about his people.
But quite Anne frankly, I'd be lying.
What do you call a pregnant slave? A two for one deal.
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.
People: Stop invading Ukraine!
Putin: Ukraine? you mean Mykraine.
You're the type of person to play "Girl on Fire" during a funeral.
What does a baby and a hand grenade have in common?
They both make noise when you throw them.
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
Confucius says, "Man who walks through airport door sideways with erection, is going to Bangkok."
What's a convict's favorite chore?
Weeding.
What’s a sheep’s favorite fruit?
A baaaaaaaanaaaaaana!
How do you make a baby astronaut sleep?
You rock-it!
What do you call a musician 👩🎤 who drinks soda and sings 🎤 at the same time?
A popsinger.
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway. 🥁