Short jokes
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
My husband is mad that I have no sense of direction, so I packed up my stuff and left. Right?
What's the fastest way to get to the hospital? Stand in the middle of the road.
What do a mag and a clip have in common? They are both good at school.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite poker hand?
Jacks and 5.
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
"I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."
Why do Jews have big noses?
Because air is free...
What do a small pair of underpants and a small dance room have in common?
No ballroom.
What do you call an apartment full of Black people?
A crackhouse.
How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable?
AIDS.
What do you call a surprised Asian?
Ho Lee Fuc.
What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid?
One of them won’t clean the oven.
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
What do an open champagne bottle and an orphan have in common? They both lost their pop.
You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.
There is an Afghan Barbie; it’s a blow-up doll.
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.
I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.