Short jokes

I would tell you a recycling joke.

But I’m afraid it’d just be reused over and over.

What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?

Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.

Why do orphans hate school?

No field trips. Parent signature_____________.

A friend of mine used to be morbidly obese, but after lots of exercise and hard work... We were able to lift his coffin.

I'm on a seafood diet, I see food and I eat it.

How many white guys does it take to screw a lightbulb?

None. They hire me to do it.

Q: Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afghanistan?

A: Because there's a Target on every corner.

I always keep anti-fungal spray with me... because I don't want to share my girlfriend with anyone.

Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.

When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?

What's the fastest thing on earth?

An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.

Just give him a smooch it’s better than the cooch - Dream

Why do orphans suck at GTA? Because they don't know how to be wanted.

It was just a prank, and stop calling our humor "plane." In our opinion, it's fire.

A woman just went through labor. She asked the doctor, "Was it a healthy delivery?" The doctor replies, "It wasn't delivery, it's DiGiorno."

What is worse than a baby getting hanged in a tree?

That same baby getting hanged in multiple trees.

I don’t see why emo kids don’t like to hang around.

I see them hang all day.

What do you do when you see a spaceman?

Park in it, man!

A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."

Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.