Short jokes
My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.
My parents told me I was born on the highway.
Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.
What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.
I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.
What do you call frozen Ibuprofen?
A chill pill.
What's a fish's least favorite instrument?
A ClariNET!
Why couldn’t 3 ask 4 on a date?
Because he was 2 squared.
Why doesn't Kermit the frog get married?
He doesn't like commitment.
I tried to take a picture of some fog. I mist.
Could a parking garage also be called a broom closet?
"Doctor, I'm shrinking!"
"Well, you'll just have to be a little patient."
Yo Mama so stupid that when she saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she turned around and went home.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?
I tried to high-five a tree. It left me hanging.
My family is like an apple tree. My sister is that ugly one that has to rot in.
Withered Bonnie, more like Bonnie Mcnutt!
What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
Predator 2.
What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
A high school pill party.
You are getting Cole for Christmas, you shit fuckers.