Short jokes
What types of erections do skeletons have? Boners.
So, me and my friend dressed as dead people for Halloween. The only difference in the costume was that he was actually dead.
Q: What do you call an elephant that isn't important?
A: My sister.
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
Pokemon: What’s Wailmer’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Rabid cow.
Rabid cow who?
Hold on, I need to get my gun...
Man in boxers leads policeman on brief chase.
What's an orphan's favorite meme?
Homer going into a bush.
Might take a while to notice and this one is bad.
What's the difference between a boy and gold?
More people want gold.
Me: *looks at person's hand* This guy doesn't have fingers!
Random person with no fingers: Why do you have to point that out?
Why do emo kids wear hoodies all the time?
Because they are hiding stitches.
Why can't the orphan take a family photo?
Answer: The orphan has no family to take a picture with.
He got a paper cut and bled out.
You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?
Why was the bee’s hair sticky?
He used honeycomb.
My name is Bishal Khan and I can't walk.
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
¿Qué hizo el cartero enojado?
Estampó su feeeeeeet!!!
When you want Pringles, but a fat person was eating them, there were only three left, sweety.