Short jokes
How do you get a light bulb horny? You turn it on!
If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?
The dark.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
Could a phone booth also be called a chatterbox?
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes?
Sneakers.
What do you call a house with dog hair?
A shed.
Where does the orphan go when he's done with school? To the cemetery.
What did the north tower say to the south tower during the summer? Get ready for fall!
cock, cock, and cum
No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."
So today I heard a friend say she had a stalker. I can confirm I've never seen a stalker following her.
Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
One gets picked.
I have a pen, I have an Apple, um, Apple pen.
The Taliban had a plane, the US had a building boom, 9/11.
I told the emo girl to stop playing fruit ninja on her wrists.
Guys, we should not make fun of 9/11. Like, that stuff is just plain out crazy. Like, you all should not let that fly.
What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?
They both smell like "Teen Spirit."
I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.