Short jokes
What's red and spins really fast?
Kurt Cobain's ceiling fan.
I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant.
So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!
Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like Blackberrys, rub one ball and everything moves!
It's telling that Ye gets more offended when he's called a gayfish than a Nazi.
“Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is?”
No sun.
A guy threatened to touch me yesterday...
What place has more boys than the Catholic Church? Michael Jackson's bedroom.
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
Why don't catholic kids lose their virginity in their 20's?
Because they lost it to a priest when they were 5
I got fired from my job today at a banana factory. They said to throw away the bad ones, so I threw away the bent ones.
Stop making 9/11 jokes. They don't land so well.
Your hairline is so bad even your gay friend is straighter than it.
I once told Siri, "Hey Siri, why am I still single?" She opened the front camera.
I've been trying to find jokes about gouging my eyes out, but I couldn't see any.
Teacher: "I'm sorry, but you got a 74 on the test."
Quiet Kid: "I'll show you my own 74."
Classroom: *visible panic*
Why didn't Trump beat Biden?
Because he couldn't trump that bitch!
Pickup lines in 2022 are like: "Are you Russia? Because your bombs are so big!"
Alabama.
Every time there's a family reunion, a baby is born 9 months later.
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
Smash or pass?
"Smash," said the iceberg.
TItanic:...