Short jokes
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run a race? Because the grass tickles their balls.
Trying to make a baby talk is like trying to negotiate with North Korea.
Why did Michael Jackson get away with it? Because he's a smooth criminal.
My sister argued with me that you can't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face when I drove pasta!
I ran into a dwarf and he said: "Well, I’m not Happy."
Then which one are you?
Why do you have to watch your back at NASA? They want to probe Uranus.
I asked a Scottish friend of mine how many sexual partners he'd had. He started counting, but fell asleep.
Life is like a penis. Long, free, flowing, and soft, until a woman comes and makes it hard. 😉
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
How to get quick cash:
Step 1: Kill a child's parents.
Step 2: Do foster care for them.
Step 3: Get paid for doing foster care.
Two skeleton brothers are talking.
1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"
2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"
I was going to make a chemistry joke. But it looks like I won’t get a reaction :)
What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.
What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? -- A pimp.
How do you blow up an Indian person?
You press the red button.
How did the octopus go to the war?
Well armed.
What time do butts get up? At the crack of dawn!!!
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball? Because they already ate the bat!
Why did the legless kid think he won a race?
Because everybody already left.
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side!