Short jokes
What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"
What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Five Guys.
Why do Emos love Christmas? So they can pretend they're ornaments and hang themselves on trees. Hope you liked it, happy holidays!
Follow me if you need advice, or just follow me.
If you really think about it, every market in Africa is a black market.
I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.
Teacher: "What do you think is your purpose in our society?"
Me: "To reduce the population by one."
Whatever happened to the emo? (wrong answer only)
Michael Jackson died of shock when he found out Boys II Men wasn't a delivery service.
DO Not Touch - the worst thing you can read in Braille.
Why was the T-rex so angry? You would be angry too if your arms were too short to masturbate.
If messyourself was on the Titanic, he would die first.
"Have you taken a bath?"
"No. Why, did one go missing?"
I looked up "I have whiplash" on WebMD, and it diagnosed me with slavery.
I once had an emo friend doing a course for the marines. He made the cut.
What 7 letters do you say when you open the fridge and see it’s empty?
O I C U R M T
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
How do you say "Brazier" in German?
Stop 'em from floppin' (German accent)
Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.
A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"
The bartender replied: "A shotgun."