Short jokes
As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
What do you call a spaceman’s willy?
A Shuttlecock!
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
The only person I'd have a cooking lesson with is Hitler.
People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head 'n Shoulders.
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
I wanna sock you in the eye so bad!
Becoming a vegetarian is a huge missed steak.
What's better than seeing a baby swing around on a clothesline at 60km/h? Stopping it with a cricket bat.
Why did they invent white chocolate?
So Black people can be messy too.
WOW this ultra realistic jenga is awesome!🔥🔥
What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?
One of them is really loud when you iron it.
Communists don't play Minecraft.
They play Ourcraft.
I think my family is racist.
I brought a black girl home, and my wife went crazy and told me to pack my bags, and my kids were upset.
Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.
There are only 2 things I hate in this world:
1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.
What’s something you might say at sea, but not at your partner?
Land ho!