Short jokes
I thought I saw Jojo Siwa... no wait, it's your hairline.
How to respond if someone starts looking at the photos on your phone.
Step 1: Jab your thumbs into their eye sockets.
Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?
Cheer up! Old age doesn't last that long!
They always say you are what you eat! So I’d be nothing. That sounds about right.
What was found under MJ's pillow after he died?
Billy's jeans.
What's Joe Biden's favorite arcade game?
Space Invaders.
Stephen Hawking once stood up to bow down to Chuck Norris.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.
Welcome to the roadkill cafe, where yesterday's crash is today's cash.
Guys, this is so wrong. I'm an orphan and this extremely offends me. I'm telling my parents, um.......
My wife cheated on me with my brother.
She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.
Friend: Stop with the self harm jokes, they're not funny.
Me: It's not that deep. I'll cut it out.
I have been thinking about suicide lately. I mean, hey, my mom tells me I can do anything I put my mind to.
I cum (Can't understand math).
Michael Jackson so white, I turned blind.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy?
Hot Wheels.
Michael Jackson died of shock when he found out Boys II Men wasn't a delivery service.
Your mum is so old that when I told her to act her age, she died.
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.