Short jokes
Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.
Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.
What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?
A minor.
I can explain Superman and Batman movies in one sentence.
Two orphans fighting in the rain.
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
What do you call a homeless Hitler?
A roofless dictator.
Why is the German blind?
Because he's a "not see."
My best friend is transgender; she transitioned from a man into a woman. I think it's courageous of her to take a pay cut like that.
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.
What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?
Some people don’t pick it.
What do Drake and math have in common? They’re both hard for kids.
You look good with anything, but nothing works too.
The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin' my dick.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke? Timing.
They say that the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. Wanna fight? 👅💦
Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.
Why did Shakespeare only write using quills?
Pencils confused him: 2b or not 2b.
I don't understand why people get offended by incest jokes; they're so family friendly.