Hang Jokes

Month

ShiftyDealer69
·

When its been halloween for a few months but there's still a body hanging from your neighbours tree

6

Emo

Emo
·

What do emos and apples have in common?

They both hang on trees.

9

Depression

Anonymous
·

What's a depressed kids favorite holiday.... Christmas because everything is hanging

4

Depression

Anonymous
·

are you a rope? bc i wanna hang with you

Japanese

Anonymous
·

Why Couldn't the Japanese man give a high five?

Because Logan Paul left him hanging.

6

Spare

Anonymous
·

What do suicidal people do in their spare time?

Hang out.

4

Wife

Scott
·

**** (A cell phone in an upscale gym locker room in NYC rings and the man puts it on loud speaker next to him … everyone else in the room stops to listen): Man : Hello? Woman : Hi honey, it's me. Are you at the club? Man : Yes. Woman : I’m out shopping and found a beautiful leather coat. It’s only $2,000 – is it OK if I buy it? Man : Sure, go ahead if you like it that much. Woman : I also stopped by that new Lexus dealership and saw one of the new models I really like – it’s on an opening special. Man : How much? Woman : $90,000. Man : Wow! OK, but for that price I want it with all the options. Woman : Great! Oh, and one more thing … I was just talking to Jamie and found out that the house we wanted to buy last year is back on the market … they’re asking $980,000 for it. Remember it was well over a million when we looked at it? Man : I dunno. Make an offer for $900,000 and they’ll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra $80,000 if that’s what you really want. Woman : OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much! Man : I love you to. **** (The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room were staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open.) The man turns around and says : “Anyone know whose phone this is”?

School

Anonymous
·

I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a piñata

Christmas

Anonymous
·

I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging

4

Depression

Lachlan
·

What did the rope say to me?

"hey there man, you wanna hang later?"

4

Depression

Anonymous
·

A depressed boy went to high five a tree guess what the tree did? The tree left him hanging

Emo

Funny 13 yr old
·

So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree

To bad he left him hanging

Depression

Anonymous
·

what do depressed people and Apple's have in common?

they both hang from trees

4

Depression

Hangy Boi
·

What's a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses?

They both leave you Hanging

2

Logan

Cecilia
·

Why did Logan Paul go to the suicide forest?

to see who's hanging around.

1

Woman

Anonymous
·

Why did the Chinese woman hang up?

Because she Wang the Wong number

5

Bar

sans
·

a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says "If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone's drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try?" the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.

8

Reason

ButtCheeksRNasty
·

so if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?

Depression

Anonymous
·

What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.

3

Bartender

5
·

A pirate walked into a bar with his ship's steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, "Hey! What's with the steering wheel?" The pirate says, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts!"

7