Me and my stepmom went into the forest.
I think I hid the body pretty well, but now I have to hide the gun.
Teacher: Where's your homework?
Student: At home...
Teacher: What's it doing there?
Student: Having a better time than me.
"Déjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Why was the astronaut washing her hands?
She was getting ready to eat launch.
My grandma refused to be an organ donor. She was buried with all her musical instruments.
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
What's worse than having ants in your pants?
Uncles.
I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he rest in peace.