Short jokes
Teacher: If you keep talking over me, I'll call your parents!
Orphan: You will?
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!
Donkeys are cool.
What cow can part water? Mooses.
Sleep, but make it forever.
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion, but the bullet didn't...
A scarecrow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field.
I will always remember my grandfather's last words: "I'll just check if it's poisonous."
I am right 95 percent of the time, who cares about that other 5 percent?
Why did the astronaut return to Earth?
She went on her launch break! 🚀🥪😋
What's the best response to a girl saying, 'What's up?'
'If I tell you, will you sit on it?'
A good woman is like a good cup of coffee, especially when it’s strong and hot with a little bit of cream in it.
What do you call Hitler speeding?
The Fast and the Fuherous.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
How many brain cells does a pregnant blonde have?
Two, one for her and one for the baby.
What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?
Lesbionage.
Jake Paul
What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs?
A paintball.
What's the twin towers' favorite football team?
New York Jets.
I visited the 9/11 memorial, that was bomb just like the towers.