Short jokes

Short jokes

Sex

*walks into sex shop*

Hello. I would like to buy 1 sex, please.

Teacher

A Chinese teacher's phone rang as he was going to class, and he said:

"My phone the ring ring, it's my wife ring ring."

Dick

Okay, boys are known to measure their dicks, but do girls measure their depths?

Forehead

Your forehead is so big that I can’t even see your hairline, and your stupid forehead face.

Nun

Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?

Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.

Difference

What's the difference between a retard and a normal person?

A normal person is not named Josh Wakling.

Vegetable

Why does the retard not like eating his vegetables? Because he knows not to be a cannibal, he knows somehow.

Wheel

What has 2 wheels and screams? A disabled [person] I dropkicked down the stairs.

Religion

Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?

Computers don’t really have a specific religion.

Log

What happens when Stephen Hawking wakes up from his sleep?

"Log in."