Short jokes
Q: What was the last thing the United Healthcare CEO heard before he got shot?
A: "It's me, Luigi!"
What do you call a booty that can do magic?
A butt trick!
Why did the rapper start gardening?
He wanted to get more ROOTS in his rhymes.
What is a nudist's least favorite holiday?
Memorial Day.
Why?
Because wearing a poppy can be very painful.
Obese is the N-word for fat people.
What is the favorite city of the pedophile icon? Paris.
My face when “Free Palestine” wasn’t a sales deal.
What do you get when a topless blonde rubs sun tanning oil on a topless brunette?
Your camera.
Why do they call matches, matches?
They all look the same.
What happens when a Jewish guy walks into a wall with a full erection?
He breaks his nose.
Ahmed is "bombuni guisisni" and Marcus is "bombardilo crocodilo" because Ahmed was late to the plane party and Marcus was first.
What do you call a terrorist in a bath?
A bath bomb.
The great meme reset is like a fart. If you force it, it's gonna be shit.
I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.
Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.
What do you call 2 nuns and a prostitute that play football?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
Old members come back, we’re bullying the pussies and idiots off the site.
POV: When the orphan kid goes to church and they have to swear on something.
The kid: "I swear on my... friends. Oh wait, I don't have any."
Let's play twin towers, your thighs are the towers and my penis is the plane, coming in between.
Why shouldn't you trust trees? Because they seem shady.
Yo mama so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.