My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!
Short Jokes
Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner.
"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race
Someday you'll go far.
"I love all mankind!" said the cannibal.
A Down syndrome child is drowning, he calls for help with all of his voice: "Somebody help me!! I'm Downing!"
BA DUM TSS
Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice?
Because it said "concentration camp."
If the noose breaks, stab yourself!
If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!
If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*
Mommy?
You're an alcoholic!
What do ya call an emo that's hung himself? Hangman.
Is George gay...? Stephen Hawking approves.
What is a king's favorite sized candy? King-sized candy!
Who is king of the pencils?
The ruler!
I got fired for not doing enough work.
Guess I didn’t put enough backbone into it.
A skeleton decided to become an assassin.
He was always skull-king around!
What is an emo kid's favorite Tool? A rope.
What kind of tree can you High-Five?
A palm tree.
