Short jokes
Your fay.
Well, you're the thing that sunk the Titanic.
I tried to catch yodeling, but he evolved to yodingalig.
"He scratched his face up, detective. That did it."
"Did I do that?"
Somebody’s son said, "Mom, my dick has white stuff coming out of it." She said, "Oh, good one, son, so when’s the baby coming?"
An Indian kid walked into the shop and had a curry down because they had no naan bread in stock.
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
What do you get when you combine a planet and an apple?
Mario.
What do gum and guns have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend all of a sudden.
How do stars die? Usually a overdose in an airport.
Uranus? More like urine is gassy! (Uranus is urine, by the way.)
When other people tell a joke, 3/3 people laugh.
When I tell a joke, 1/3 people laugh, but 2/3 people stare into my soul.
I got a chicken drum stick for lunch, thought I might drum up an appetite!
Yo mama is so stupid that she thought NASA is a gaming program!
Q: A mom had 5 children: January, February, March, April. What is the name of the fifth child?
A: What.
Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
What do you call a malignant cell in Paris?
A Royale with cancer.
Ethan Rice
Anyone know how to get an A on the "An Inspector Calls" section of the GCSE paper?
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite drug?
Battery acid.
"Spell ICUP."