Short jokes
The other day my girlfriend asked me to hand her the red lipstick, so I handed her the dog.
Well, I didn’t get as high as I wanted to, but I’m high enough that if I fall I’d probably break something.
What did the boy say to his brother at chemistry class?
"Hey BrO!"
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
VVD [is] better than Sergio Ramos.
What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?
Obi-Wan Canopy
Pickled carrots.
Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah).
Student: How should I know, that's his story?
My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. He said, "Get your paws off my toy!"
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
/setblock minecraft_morbid_joke
/playsound pained_laugh
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
I have so many cash machine jokes.
But none of them seem to work ATM.
Why don't Jedi like their female relatives?
Because they are Sith-ters.
How can you help a llama on holiday?
Alpaca your bags.
"I only eat food on the right of my plate."
"Are you good at eating?"
"I'm alright at eating."
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
She does not wanna fuck you, and she don’t need you clapping them cheeks.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
How do chemists laugh?
HeHe.