Short jokes
Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?
A: A cold shoulder.
We should stop being mean to orphans.
We should be cruel instead.
What's common in vampires and American kids?
They both don't get old.
Logan Taub has a BBC, Big Butt Chin!
Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.
Why are orphans good at dodge ball?
Because no one misses them.
Me: You have terrible jokes.
Mum: Shows me a mirror.
I went to the grocery and they said I did something wrong, but I thought they were talking about a food, so I said, "Wrong yummy!"
Long live the quee—Oh wait...
Why do they call them a nonce?
Because they go for people who don't have any sense.
My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.
I told her to keep her chins up.
What's the difference between red wings and old cassette tape players?
One eats tape while the other eats pussy.
I asked a European what do you call Karens in your country? He said, "American women."
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.
I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word “Mother-in-law” you get the words “Woman Hitler”.
Yo papa's wife is so dumb and fat that we had to use yo papa.
What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?
A box office bomb.
"Officer, don’t arrest me, she said she was 5 in dog years!"
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!
I used to hate foot fungus, but now it's growing on me.