Short jokes
Why did a Mexican go to Home Depot?
Because he thought it said "Home Deport."
I once told an orphan to go big or go home. He replied, "I can't get home; it got bombed."
Q: What's the difference between a prison and a concentration camp?
A: At least you don't die when you shower.
Messi is really messy.
Guess what my plans are for the weekend? Suing the NYCDOE for blocking (probably) WEBTOONS.com.
What age is served for breakfast?
I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.
What were the webs?
Yo hairline caused corruption.
Why does Sonic wear gloves? Because his hands are cold.
What does Sonic wear when he goes to the beach? A speedo.
How much does a hipster weigh?
About an Instagram.
I tried having a three-way with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three-body problem.
What do you call an angry nut with a mustache?
A pistachio.
How do you catch an elephant?
Act like a peanut.
Can I ask you a question? Nut now!
Don’t panic! Stay c-almond collected.
A friend asked what an acorn is.
I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”
"Don’t look! I saw you peeking through the window."
You can assume a horse is called a great jumper when the horse’s name is “Polo Neck”.