Short jokes
You can assume a horse is called a great jumper when the horse’s name is “Polo Neck”.
When you unplug the charger to charge your phone, but you realize it was plugged into your grandpa's life support:
Why woman?
Why can't I get a girlfriend?
Because I'm a beta male simp.
I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
"Welcome to the gulag."
Your momma's so fat, she had to take a selfie using the Hubble telescope.
Hope the towers are doing well this morning, and I'll get back to you!
What do Shrek and onions have in common?
*LAYERS*
Me: What’s the definition of “ignorance”?
Friend: Don’t know?
Me: U STUPID!
I have trash so I throw it at my sister and say that she is a trash can.
You're so ugly that I choked and died.
I had morning wood one day. Then my sister saw it and said, "I can help!"
Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.
What is small, black and yellow, and drops things?
A fumble bee.
Bowling is like child support: it involves balls.
Did you know emo kids are the highest jumpers in the world? Some are still up there!
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
My hopes and dreams.
How do you surprise a blind guy?
Say, "Surprise!"