Short jokes
"Like if u cry everytime."
Your hairline goes so far back even Dwayne Johnson refused to sit there.
Sorry but, no one asked.
789.
I threw a lamp at an emo kid and told him to lighten the f*ck up.
The orphan also had to cry because the cartels called him "homie."
Battery 1%.
I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.
What do you call an emo with curly hair?
Sam Reid.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.
Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.
It's not Minecraft.
It's Ourcraft!
Me: Knock knock.
My Grandma: Who’s there?
Me: Interrupting cow.
My Grandma: Interrupting c-
[Dies from heart attack]
Why can't Kobe go shopping?
He's dead.
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
Why was Stephen Hawking always like this 🫠?
Because he didn’t have emojis on his computer.
Your hairline is so far back that my father couldn't even reach the store in time before it grew!
This anorexic girl wanted to fight me. I told her that I would roast her, but she didn't have any meat.
Kid: Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who’s there?
Kid: Not your parents.
Your mom #69.
I-I-I-I-I-I keep on hopin' we'll eat cake by the ocean, uh!
Has anyone alive ever died?
Is this our eternal life?