I bought a Dalek egg timer recently...
After a few minutes, it shouts, "Eggs terminate!"
Short Jokes
When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."
What did the screw say to the screw? We sure screwed things up!
What is the difference between cum and milk? Nothing. They are both white and tasty.
Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe till they're all black and blue!
Rocks are used too much; people take 'em for granite.
Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.
What do you call someone who is extra virgin?
Mrs. Frame.
Q: What’s a good thing about child molesters?
A: They drive slow through school zones.
My "choco" is too "late" for lunch.
Why is a pro fighter like a fisher?
They both can throw a hook.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
Where do sex addicts go when they need to talk? Hoe-and-Tell.
What do LGBTQ+ people use as a weapon in THG (The Hunger Games)?
A rainbow.
The news of the brother getting sucked off regularly by his sister spread really fast... all over her face 🤤.
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
Cut.
What do starving kids call Venetian blinds?
Bunk beds.
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?
A clout chaser.
Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.
