Short jokes
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, you look like a donkey, and smell like one, too.
Gay is a mental illness.
You're not thinking straight.
What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?
Smoking.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
My grandfather died at Auschwitz.
Poor fella fell off the guard tower.
How do you start a dance party?
Go into the PTSD ward of an insane asylum and set off fireworks and watch the magic unfold.
So, my dad was drinking, so he was drunk, and I was sad. But can you be my friend, please?
I tried to stick to One Direction, but then they started to shoot the gay bar...
What’s the difference between women and condoms?
There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.
God, people are so sensitive these days. You can't even say, "Paint the wall black," you have to say, "Jamal, could you paint the wall?"
What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?
They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.
I used to be a banker...
But then I lost interest.
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can't drink and derive.
What would Hitler be called if he abused women? Hither!
What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?
Both get food thrown at them some of the time.
Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
A chopper full of white people is also called a helicopter.
A chopper full of black people is called a hellacopter.
Foreplay in may areas: "You awake?"
Way down South: "You awake, mom?"
Conspiracy Theorists: Technoblade is still alive!
Me: Pigs live between 15 and 20 years!
Fans: 😭😭😭