Short jokes
Kenny: "Tyler, you're lucky you're adopted."
Tyler: "Why?"
Kenny: "Because you can fuck your mom without getting arrested for incest."
What's Juice Wrld's favorite salad? A seizure salad.
Why do Imagine Dragons dream about mythical creatures?
Because they're believers.
If Jesus told you to trust everyone, that must be why there are a lot of kidnappings.
Like this if you have ever had a family member die.
Papyrus: Sans, stop being a lazy Bones.
Sans: Why bro, guess you don't have the back bone to do anything, heheh.
What do you call an Indian going through the bins?
RUM-MAJINGG
America saying they are more stupid. Russia saying they are more stupid = the stupidest war.
I would say fly high to Kobe, but obviously he didn't...
I would tell you a joke about my dink, but it's too long.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
Hate me all you want, but I gotta say, this whole thing with Gwen and TJ is ridiculous.
What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have a touchy feeling for kids.
I didn’t know Stephen Hawking died. Oh god, it must have been when I disconnected the Wi-Fi!
What do you call a cow that lives in Africa? Moo-fasa!
Why can’t orphans win trophies?
Because they can’t take them home.
Imagine not having parents. Lol.
What's the difference between a drill and a priest?
Nothing, they both like screwing stuff!
My brother's addicted to buying ladders; he loves to get high.
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time," so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.
— Steven Wright