Short jokes
Why did Spider-Man decide to buy a laptop?
So that he could design his own “website.”
Two lepers playing cards... one threw his hand in; the other laughed his head off.
What is an astronaut's favorite part of a keyboard?
The SPACE BAR!
Why did the farmer eat a fork?
'Cause he's a dumbass.
What is similar about the feelings of a girl's birth daddy and her new pimp daddy?
They both worry about how she will turn out!
Little boy: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Little boy: Your parents.
Have you walked into Steven Hawking's house yet?
Yeah, neither has he.
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
So my friend's birthday was coming up, so I got him a new box to live in.
Paper.
Aww c'mon! I thought my joke made the cut!
What is a female gamer's favorite part of the controller?
The joystick.
Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."
My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.
That being said I wish he hadn't!
You smell like tap water and cornflakes.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
What's better than 5 babies in one dumpster?
1 baby in 5 dumpsters.
It isn't a real charity until India opens call centers, like they did with Africa.
If you drink hand sanitizer, does it only kill 99.9% of you?...........💀
What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.
What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.