Short jokes
Buy KFC = 1 more orphan in our fryers.
Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.
1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.
I'm great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"
What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench?
The bench can support its family.
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
Kid singing “abcd.”
Person says, “No, no, it’s obcd.”
Yo mama so fat and old, she is the reason the Great Depression happened.
What’s the difference between orphans and cars?
I don’t have 1080 cars in my basement.
Why are Elmo’s jealous of lights?
Lights are hanging.
I would make a joke about fat people, but they already have enough on their plate.
What is the difference between a fat person and a whole pizza?
Well, a whole pizza cannot eat a fat person.
Yo, your hairline so messed up God said your hairline on the cross getting hit on that cross.
Do you remember what Bruce Willis' last movies were?
Neither does he.
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
I'm gonna cut my life off.
What do you call 2 nudists in Africa?
Naked and Afraid.
Why can’t a nose be 12 feet long?
Because then, it would be a foot.
Say "I hate happiness" without the H (all of them).
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.