Short jokes
What do parents feeding their kids and terrorists have in common?
“Here comes the airplane!”
What is a group of singing terrorists called? A Taliband.
Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.
When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.
Beethoven composed his whole life.
What did he do in the afterlife? He decomposed! Har har har har har har.
Why did the idiot post so many 9/11 jokes?
Answer: Because his mom is a whore!
Qassem Soleimani is so popular today.
I mean, he just blew up overnight!
Why could you not see the guy in my dark closet?
The guy was black.
When a wheelchair kid bends over, wheelchair kid goes “ohhahahhahhahahahahal!”
What is black, smells bad, and long? Line to social services.
What was going through the head of a 9/11 victim on the 88th floor?
The 89th floor.
When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."
How many Sallys does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, she was electrocuted.
Your hairline's so far up, they call it a skyline!
Me: I saw your parents yesterday.
Orphan girl: Where?
Me: The coffin was still open.
Wanna see a mistake go on camera and take a pic of you?
Me: Hey Siri, did you know Candice died?
Siri: Yes, I was informed she died from sugondese.
Me: What is that?
Siri: Sugondese nuts.
You’re so fat,
that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.
You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”
You're so fat,
when you stepped on the scale,
Buzz Lightyear came out and said,
"To infinity and beyond!"
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.