Short jokes
What do you call four black people in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat.
Why did the emo kids stop going to their favorite tree?
It died before them.
What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.
What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
What is the difference between runners and my car?
My car is still running.
I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.
My grandma always looks at me when we go to a wedding and says, "You’re next!"
When we attend a funeral, I say, "You’re next!"
How are Black people like communism?
Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.
Why do women hate having sex with midgets?
Because of their shortcomings.
The term "every 60 seconds" is so stupid.
You know Africans don’t get seconds.
What do you call a blowjob in Africa?
Breakfast.
I was driving and accidentally hit a crippled kid. They were still breathing, so I told them to walk it off.
I used to believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
Don't commit suicide, that would make DJUNGELSKOG sad!
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
Why did the short person become a chef?
Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it was made by the same company that made their life decisions.
Why did the skydiver bring a backup parachute?
In case the first one wanted to "cut ties" with them mid-air.