Shop jokes
Welcome to Jimmy's orphanage and pizza shop, where today's loss is a sauce. How may I help you?
What do you call a wild cow in a shop with old things?
A bull in a china shop.
Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
Why can't Kobe go shopping?
He's dead.
"I work with animals," a man said on his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who works with animals. Where do you work?" "At the butcher shop!"
Taking you to go grocery shopping does have its perks... You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
Why can orphans never go to the shops?
'Cause the Talibans will plane dive into them.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
Yo mama so poor, she chased a garbage truck with a shopping list.
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?
Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.
Yesterday my mom forgot to go grocery shopping, and I was starving, so I kept opening the fridge about 100 times, but nothing new was in there.
I went to the shops and still didn’t find Lucy’s dad.
Where do orphans shop?
Home Bargains.
Why are orphans banned from the shop?
No adult to pay for them.
Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a pony. He opened up a pasta shop and made some macaroni.
Mom: I'm going to the shop. If someone is at the door, don't open it.
Me: Ok.
*Ring*
Me: Opens the door.
Oh sh*t!
Mom: Gets flip flop.
What's the difference between your dad and grocery shopping?
He didn't come back with the milk.
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
Notice on a shoe repair shop: I’ll heel you, I’ll save your sole, I’ll even gladly dye for you.