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Boundary

    • If a woman says she needs to set boundaries between you and her, you would be crossing it if you are a Mexican.

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    • Benefit

    • Was drinking in a bar with this girl when I suddenly blacked out. The next morning I received a letter saying they are processing my child benefits application, dafaq? I never had kids.

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    • Say memes

    Sentence

    • One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very intelligent.” The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?” Little Suzie says, “They are very fashionable.” The teacher says, “Johnny, why don’t you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence.” Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy, ‘Darling, how does my dick taste?’”

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    • Immortal

    • Let's say I was immortal. No matter what I did, I would be alive. But, the catch is I’m the least flexible and least strong person in the world.

    Now, I get my head chopped off. What would I do? I would roll over to my headless body and figure out what it's like to suck my own dick.

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    • Orphanage

    • Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.

    Farmer

    • A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

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    • Turd

    • Jingle bells, Braedyn says, "Yummy!" to a turd.

    Then, he takes it out of the toilet and wipes it all over the wall!

    Jingle bells, Braedyn says, "Yummy!" to a turd.

    Then, he takes it out of the toilet and wipes it all over the wall!

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