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Danny just bought a new game from Steam for a penny.
About one hour later, Danny asks his mother: "Mom, I am not able to start the game."
Mom asked, "Why?"
Danny answers: "It says 'Press any key' on the screen, but I can't find an 'Any' button on my keyboard."
"Meow, meow, woof, woof." That's what animals say to me when I die.
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
I gave my sister a compliment and said she's pretty, then while she was saying thanks, I said, "pretty ugly."
Me: You are pretty. Her: Thanks. Me: Pretty ugly.
Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?
A: "Those are two nice towers right there."
What did the goat say?
"Let's play the grass!"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣funny joke yes
Luisa: The ship doesn't swerve, as it heard how big the iceberg is.
Captain of the Titanic: Wait, what did you say?
3 minutes later:
Why didn't I listen to the strong one?
What time is it when you say "what?"
Time to start over!
"What did the orphan say to the other orphan? \"You have a dad? Say he can have me, I will (let) you, so he can adopt me.\""
How does water say hi?
It waves.
People say towers can't move. Apparently, nobody told that to the Trade Centers.
A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The penguin asks the polar bear, "Hey, can you pass the soap?" The polar bear obliges.
A few moments later, the penguin asks, "Hey, can you pass the scrubber?" The polar bear does. Shortly after that, the penguin says, "Hey, can you pass the rubber ducky?"
The polar bear, beginning to become upset, turns to the penguin and says, "What do you think I am? A radio?!"
A friend of mine says "Baguette" all the time cuz she is French.
What did the spaghetti say to the sauce? Pasta la vista!
What does a nun say when you ask too many questions?
"Nunya business!"
Your hairline so bad even God says, "Aaaaahhhh!"
What did the bunger say to the bunger? Bunger.
A cop pulls two Arabian men over, walks up to their window, and says, "We are looking for two child molesters!"
Now after a short pause, the two men look at each other, then back at the officer and say, "We'll do it!"
So a man asked another man, "What's your name?"
He says, "What's it to ya?"
So the guy asked again, "And he says what's it to ya?"
Come to find out his name was What's It To Ya.
Son, what is 1 plus 1?
Dad, I don't know.
Son, it is 2.
Dad, oh, I was gonna say 2.