Said jokes

I prank called someone and I said, "Is there a Missis Wall there?" They said no. Is there a Mr. Wall there? They said no. Are there any Walls there? They said no. Then what's holding up your building?

My sister said I'm stupid today, and she's the one who wrote this.

What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.

My sis came up to me and said, "Mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year."

"So, uh, you free tomorrow?" 😂

Clowns were doing an egg contest, and one clown had their egg crack, and another clown said, "The yoke's on you!"

Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time."

"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man," said the young woman.

"Why?" said her friend.

"Oh, I don't know, just men are so cool,"

"Is that the only reason?" said her friend.

"Maybe........" said the young woman. "Maybe."

Two Timetravers walk into a bar...

...the bartender then said, "Sorry, we don't serve Timetravers here."

I walked up to 2 people kissing and stared.

After a little while, they asked me if I minded. I said no, I don’t mind.

I was at a milk store and ordered some milk.

They brought it over but spilled it on me.

I said that was a udder failure!

"Knock, knock?"

"Who's there?"

"Cow said."

"Cow said who?"

"Cow says moo you ding dong!"

Your mama so ugly, when the baby came out of her, the baby didn't cry. The baby said, "What the hell is this shit?" and walked out of the hospital.

My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said, "Haha, that is funny!"

I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"

She said, "Yes."

"Knock knock."

I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"

I asked my sister to say something.

She said, "No."

That's what I like to hear.

Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"

I told my sister to make a noise and hear what she said... "Cuckoo coo chew." #Owl🦉

I asked my dad to come to my Father’s Day breakfast.

The orphanage worker just said, “Don’t be silly!”

What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?

"To bee or not to bee."

My friend bought a Tom Holland blanket and I said, "Well, now you're sleeping with him."