Romance jokes
Roses are red, Violets are twisted, Come back to my place, You might get fisted.
Had an amazing night with this girl, woke up, and it was my aunt. Now I’m in love.
I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?
My bf: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
My bf: Ice cream.
Me: Ice cream who?
My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!
He placed the chocolates and the flowers down beside her.
Silence...
And then at last she spoke...
"Unexpected item in the bagging area."
Memes
Just something wholesome to help you recover from whatever you just saw.
A girl and a boy were on a date. The boy kept farting. The girl asked, "What is wrong?!?". The boy replied, "Explosive diarrhea.". The girl said, "Ew".
The boy went to the bathroom, and the place exploded. The center of the explosion, the bathroom.
How did the blind girl get a date?
She said it was love at first sight.
You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇
Hey girl, are you a scientist?
Cause you made my thing into a baking soda volcano.
Boy: “My heart MELTS for you.”
Girl: “OMG, are you okay?!?!”
Boy: “Yeah, why?”
Girl: “Because if your heart is melting, then you are NOT okay.”
Are you a horse, because I want to ride you?
What do you call 2 emos making out in a science classroom?
My Chemical Romance.
Roses are red, violets are purple, lay in my bed so I can suck your nurple.
What do you call two emos in a chemistry lab?
My Chemical Romance.
So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"
Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"
Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"
Why was the people's wedding so miserable...
'Cause during the kiss someone farted so loud and stinky, they agreed to never try to have another wedding.
"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"
I always press the stop button to see you.
I confessed to my crush in preschool. Unfortunately, she rejected me. I just carried on and got right back to teaching.
I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.