Romance jokes

What do you call skeletons having sex?

When the relationship is dead, but you're still fucking.

Roses are red, the grass is greener, when I see you, I play with my wiener.

The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.

Roses are red, violets are purple, lay in my bed so I can suck your nurple.

Is that a mirror in your pants? Cause I can see myself inside them.

My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day:

Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you're told.

Gf: Babe, do you love me?

Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.

Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...

Bf: Exactly.

Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.

Love that dress; it would look much better on my floor, though.

Is that a mirror in your pocket?

'Cause I can see myself in your pants.

I like my women like a day: 24 year olds. 24 hours of fun.

The match: "Ur my match." The thighs: "You light me up."

I don't need a girlfriend, 'cause I got my cousin, bro.

Are you my depression, because I’m falling for you?

Roses are red,

romance is dead,

every day I suffer from existential dread.

Me: Truth or dare?

Crush: Dare.

Me: I dare you to give me your phone number.

Crush: Umm nevermind, truth.

Me: Ok, what is your phone number?

He placed the chocolates and the flowers down beside her.

Silence...

And then at last she spoke...

"Unexpected item in the bagging area."

Roses are red, you have a nice lip, it would look better if it was on my tit.

Roses are red... blood is too... I wonder how blood would look on you.

Roses are red, Violets are twisted, Come back to my place, You might get fisted.

What did Cinderella leave at the ball?

Her virginity.