Romance jokes

Why was the people's wedding so miserable...

'Cause during the kiss someone farted so loud and stinky, they agreed to never try to have another wedding.

What is the Twilight series about?

A girl's choice between necrophilia and bestiality.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, In your eyes' reflection, My dreams come true.

I'm not counting, but I have some fingers for you.

I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.

Your love life.

I confessed to my crush in preschool. Unfortunately, she rejected me. I just carried on and got right back to teaching.

If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fine-apple.’

Do you know what's lonely?

Your lips, wanna meet mine?

Who thinks that Prince should just avoid Qwen and just continue the relationship?

Riley....I...I think I wanna be more than friends.

Summary of Twilight in one sentence:

Bella hits on two guys, runs away. Edward glances to Jacob saying, "Go Fetch," and suddenly Bella's his.

In Junior High, we had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood the report and wrote about how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.

I had a girlfriend who was a below-the-knee amputee. We broke up because she just couldn't keep her legs closed.

Who wants to be my boyfriend?

Roses are red, the grass is greener,

Every time I think of you, I play with my weenie.

Girl: Hi (flirt)

Boy: Hi? (reluctant)

Girl: I'm a cheerleader captain, I'm also single (flirt).

Boy 2: Excuse me?! He's MY MAN...

When Lexa took Clarke out on a date, she walked past the candle shop, and she bought all the candles. After the date, they went back to the Heda's (Commander's) Tower, which is basically a huge candle. "All I wanna do is Candle you!"

One day Jack and Jill went up a hill. Jack got Jill drunk and horny, then took her to a hotel because Jack wanted to suck and lick her candy stick.

What did the booty say to the chair?

"You complete me!"