Romance jokes
Summary of Twilight in one sentence:
Bella hits on two guys, runs away. Edward glances to Jacob saying, "Go Fetch," and suddenly Bella's his.
What is the Twilight series about?
A girl's choice between necrophilia and bestiality.
I had a girlfriend who was a below-the-knee amputee. We broke up because she just couldn't keep her legs closed.
What do you call a romance movie for Down syndrome people? Chromeo and Juliet.
I saw a cute coworker and had sex in the back until I realized it is a family business.
In Junior High, we had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood the report and wrote about how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:
Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?
Because he wanted grapes.
Why was the mountain in love with the volcano?
Because the volcano was hot!
What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?
"Want to see if it fits?"
Roses are red. I love hot food. If I was a bad bitch, I'd wanna fuck me too.
Oh wait, I am.
What’s something you can say in a grocery store and in bed?
"Thanks for coming."
We aren't ghosts, but I'll take you under the sheets.
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
I'm not counting, but I have some fingers for you.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Get over here so I can fuck you.
Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
You’re so fine that my zipper is falling for you.