Relationship jokes

What do people have a shot at when it comes to love? Shooting them in the heart.

Your uncle Jack is stuck on a horse.

Would you help your uncle "Jack" off the horse?

Neona (😞): Are you mad at me?

Gwen (😌): Me? NEVER! Sometimes we listen and don't listen, let's just hug it out!

Neona (😁): Agreed!

What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?

A family photo.

I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.

I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.

Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think, "I hope you get laid tonight."

By a tweaker with AIDS.

Hey, this is to orphans:

"Orphans are ugly. We need to know each other :D We need to date, cause ur hot and so am I and orphans rly are ugly!!!!"

Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Your Boyfriend.

Your Boyfriend who?

Your Boyfriend who doesn’t love you! Bye!

My ex was so full of shit, she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.

freshfry, we need to talk now...

Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles, and lighten your burden."

Boy: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles."

Girl: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet!"

How can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives three fucking nights in a row.

Why can orphans not get married?

They are dad can't walk them down the aisle!

Q: What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said to Courtney Love before he died?

A: “Holes gonna be big.”

What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?

A family portrait/A selfie.

Wife: “I want another baby.”

Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”

Me and the boys are cool.

How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!