Relationship jokes
Why do orphans love tennis? It's the only love they get.
In tennis, 0 points is love.
She does not wanna fuck you, and she don’t need you clapping them cheeks.
Do you have a halo?
'Cause I can give it to you.
What did your mom say last night? "Go harder!"
What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.
Memes
Dating a girl and studying mathematics, both give a headache.
I like my dynamite like I like my woman: hot and ready to explode.
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday. Let's just say I quit my job as a butcher.
Ur mom gay.
My brothers kept annoying me.
I told them I would disembowel them if they kept it up.
It was an empty threat—right after I was done.
Knock knock, Who's there? Dad. You came back?
Yeah, she called me "Pledge" because I knocked the dust off it.
Your dad must be a mailman.
At what point does a joke become a dad joke?
When it disappears and never returns home.
How are women like swimming pools?
They cost a great deal of money to maintain considering the time you spend inside.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
Did you hear about the young man who brought floral arrangements in the shape of a life jacket on his friend’s funeral who drowned last week?
Everyone was furious, but he explained, “It’s what he would have wanted.”
What’s the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your smile's warmth, Lights up my view.
Why are gay men better than straight women?
Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.