Relationship jokes
Your mom is a spy <3, just like in bed.
My wife and I were out to dinner and the waitress started flirting with me.
"She obviously has COVID," my wife said.
"Why?" I asked.
My wife replied with a sneer, "Because she has no taste!"
What do guns and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What do you call a selfie that an orphan takes?
A family picture.
My heart broke as I went down the stairs, and my girlfriend broke her heart.
Me: "Cya"
Mom: "Where ya going?"
Me: "The orphanage to make yo mama jokes."
Mum: ...
When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.
Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔
I masturbated by accident. I read the wrong thing And tested its factuality.
Well, it's been some good years now, haven't they? Being your own partner has never felt so together.
His gay ass dad.
Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.
Mom: Witherspoon.
Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!
Jack and Jill went up a hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."
I am Mario's brother.
The orphan's best friend wanted to meet his family, so he took a selfie.
What do orphans call a family picture?
A selfy.
I bought this happy birthday card for this orphan.
To: The Orphan
From: ______
What do you call gay parents?
Poly.
Everybody add @christianisni22 on Snap!
He's a hot babe and he's single.
Wife: [Looks] in the mirror. Wife: I look fat, can you say something positive? Husband: At least your eyes work.