Really jokes

Should cishet people REALLY be watching Ranboo?

Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.

I hop on Clash Royale. I see Mega Knight. I cry.

Like if you hate the Mega Knight from Clash Royale because I really, really hate it so much!

Aaaah, I really wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor...

I really need some new parts to my go-kart.

Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?

Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.

|| 20 YEARS LATER ||

Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?

Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.

Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.

Teacher: "If you're dumb, stand up."

Nobody stands up.

After some waiting, the teacher says, "Really? No one? There must be someone."

Little Johnny stands up.

"Oh, so you think you're dumb, Johnny?"

"Nah, I just feel bad that you're standing alone."

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.

What do you call a man in love with an emo?

I really don't know.

If I'm holding a cricket ball in each hand, what do I have?

A really fucking huge cricket.

Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?

Poor guy really needs some space.

My mom and dad got home from a party pretty late. Why do I know? Because I was playing Minecraft all night.

Anyways, they get home and start fumbling up the stairs and being really loud. I could have swore I heard them fall down. I assumed they were drunk. I was just playing my Switch when they come into my room. Now I'm about 10 at the time so I watch them get undressed IN MY FUCKING BED! I then just stare at them as they notice me before I witness anything. They say that they were doing "intense kissing" the next morning. I believed that at the time, but now I've been to health class. I now know the truth. I wish I hadn't.

That's wheely (really) sad.

One time a kid came to the hospital and said, "I really need help." The kid said he was really hot, so they put an ice cold towel on him.

Then the doctor asked him if he had any problems, and he said, "Yes, I am really hot." The doctor realized that he looked fine, so he said, "Are you sure? You look amazing." And the kid said that he meant to say, "I look hot!"

This is not really a joke, but it's a question.

If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?

Can you really wheel my real wheelchair?

Try saying that over and over fast. Bit of a tongue twister.

A woman comes from a restaurant and ate a lot of beans.

When she gets home, her husband puts a blindfold on her and says not to take it off. The lady hears her husband leave the room and starts farting really loudly. When the husband comes back and takes off the blindfold, the lady sees 12 people with pegs on their noses singing happy birthday!

This isn't really a joke, but I HAVE PTSD, YAY! :)

You guys know the notes A Minor and D? I really like putting D in A Minor!

If you make jokes about SH, you're not funny, and if you do, I'm gonna assume you're some 12-year-old who wants to be an edge lord. I don't really care if people get pressed.

How do you tell if a blond is really stupid?

Put a scratch and sniff on a bleach pod.