Question

Question jokes

Exam

  • There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.

    Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.

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  • Wordplay

  • A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.

    He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.

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  • Homework

  • I was at school one day, and my teacher gave me homework. Once I got home, I did not do my homework, but I watched TV. After the movie, I finally went to go do my homework. I was almost done with my homework when I got to the last question. I didn't know the answer, so I asked the closest living being to me, which was my dog, and I asked him: what's two minus two? He said nothing.

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  • Poacher

  • The poacher agrees but says that his assistant is ill and will need the man to come with him in his assistant's place. The man agrees, and so the poacher goes out to the jungle with the man.

    The poacher brings a pair of handcuffs, a long stick, a shotgun, and a dog. They search through the jungle for about an hour and then spot a male gorilla above in the treetops.

    The man asks the poacher what the plan is. The poacher replies, "I'm going to climb the tree and, when I get close enough, I'm going to start poking the gorilla with the stick until it falls out of the tree.

    The dog is a specially trained dog. When the gorilla falls out of the tree, the dog will try to bite off the gorilla's balls. When the gorilla moves its hands to protect its balls, you put the handcuffs on it."

    This all seems to make sense to the man, but he has one question. "What is the shotgun for?" he asks the poacher. The poacher responds: "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, shoot the dog."

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  • Banana

  • Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Banana.

    Banana who?

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Banana.

    Banana who?

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Orange.

    Orange who?

    Orange you glad I did not say banana? Ha ha!

    Scarecrow

  • My priest asked if anyone had any questions or anything interesting they wanted to say.

    So I raised my hand, he said why don’t you tell everyone what you have to say.

    In front of the whole church I said I did not know Jesus Christ was the first scarecrow.

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  • Orphanage

  • I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him, "Where are your parents?"

    Bad move, I got fired from my job at the Orphanage.

    Knock

  • 5 knock knock jokes from best to corny.

    1. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Needle. Needle who? Needle little help getting in the door.

    2. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!

    3. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Mikey. Mikey who? Mikey isn't working, can you let me in?

    4. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Says. Says who? Says me, that's who!

    5. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are, asking all these questions?

    Compliment

  • Question: What do you say to give a woman from West Virginia a "Nice Compliment"?

    Answer: You say to her: "NICE TOOTH!"

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  • Paint

  • Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.