What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.
Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."
Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong.
TommyInnit said, "Long live the Queen." Look at where she's at now.
What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?
Driving under the influencer.
It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.
He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.
Wife: [Looks] in the mirror. Wife: I look fat, can you say something positive? Husband: At least your eyes work.
Quote of the day:
Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.
[Comment your favorite fall beverage!]
Anthony Blinken's life sucks, and getting COVID-19 positive is the only positive thing that ever happened in his entire life!
My mom told me to be positive...
I was heading to an HIV test.
I got evicted from the hospital today for telling all the patients to stay positive!
What a negative effect!
A guy goes in to get some tests done. The doctor comes out and says, "I got good news and bad news." The guy says, "Ok, let's get the bad news out of the way." The doctor says, "The tests came back positive. You got two weeks to live." The guy says, "Oh My God!! Then what the hell is the good news?" Doctor says "You see that nurse over there, the one with the big tits? I'm screwin' her."
I woke up on the floor this morning. I think I woke up on the wrong side though.
Think like a proton--stay positive!
Do you know why an atom is positive? He kept his electrons.
Don't say "stay positive" to the wrong doctor.
Well on the positive side: the Mexicans will probably want to pay for, and build, that wall at this point! Maybe the Canadians as well; two free walls!
My mother told me to be positive, but she said that when I was going to do an AIDS test.
What do you call 2 nuns and a prostitute that play football?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
