Position jokes

My mother told me to be positive, but she said that when I was going to do an AIDS test.

Do you know why an atom is positive? He kept his electrons.

Don't say "stay positive" to the wrong doctor.

Well on the positive side: the Mexicans will probably want to pay for, and build, that wall at this point! Maybe the Canadians as well; two free walls!

Think like a proton--stay positive!

What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?

Cantonese...

I used to work for a company called 69. My friend took over my position.

What is monkey's favorite position? Donkey Kong.

Gwen-Kind-Positive-Lends a Helping Hand- Stops Bullies- Does Most Helpful Work.

Addison Banks- Positive Voicing-Stops Hurtful Words.

ALYA-Powerful in Thought- Helps- But Sadly Is Gone.

Prince-Always Backed Up Gwen- But Sadly Is Gone Too.

Watersharky-Helps When Needed-Backs Up Anyone- Curses When Needed- Helps People Through Depression.

These Are The Legends, There Are More Out There You Could Be One Too Just Lend a Helping Hand.

Hello everyone, have a great day and be positive!

What did one negative say to the other negative? Together we can make a positive.

My favorite sex position is the JFK:

I splatter all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.

What do you call 2 nuns and a prostitute that play football?

Two tight ends and a wide receiver.

Good Morning Everyone, have a good and positive day!

Why do pedophiles never cum first?

Because they like to cum in a little behind.

Two guys were on a hunting trip, and after the first day of hunting, they didn’t see anything, so they decided the next day they would split up and meet back at the fire at dinner time.

After a day of hunting, they meet back at the fire, and one hunter asked the other, “How did your day go?”

The one hunter said, “I had the best day ever! I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever. We had sex for hours in every position you could think of.”

Then the other hunter asked him, “Was she a good lookin’ blond?” And he said, “Oh, I don’t know, I didn’t find her head.”

Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?

Me running out of the hospital after telling COVID patients to stay "positive."

What position would a man with no legs and arms play in baseball?

Home base.

Your hairline's exactly like your nose; it's always offside.