Player jokes
How do clarinet players play a song?
They reed their music.
Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad!
- 0 tapins! - 0 assists! - 3/3 dives! - 0 key passes! - 2 big chances missed! - 1/4 dribbles! - 2 Offsides! - 27 claps!
Better than Elanga?
Mfs be saying Kobe is good at basketball cause he is 6 feet, ye 6 feet underground.
Among Us players after saying "Self Report!" to the police officers who find a dead body in their basement.
Why did the football player go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
Kobe missed a lot of shots, but he sure didn’t miss the mountain.
What is an orphan's favorite video game?
"Who's Your Daddy?"
Technoblade can defeat every Minecraft player, but he still can’t defeat cancer!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They never hit home.
What do you call a basketball player with erectile dysfunction?
Tragic Johnson.
As an honest Penaldo fan, I have to admit he is a penalty merchant. He can only score against farmer teams like Spezia. He never shows up against great teams like Barcelona.
I've come to realize my hero Penaldo will never be better than Messi. My idol Penaldo is sadly finished.
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
"I've only been ripped off twice in my life. The first time was when I ordered three kebabs and they only delivered two. The second time was when we signed Cristiano Ronaldo."
-Al Nassr owner
MISSING MISSING!!! 😢😢
NAME: PRUNO PENANDES 👍🤝
MISSING: 27/6/21 VS BELGIUM 🤔🤔
LAST SEEN: DIVING AT OLD TRAFFORD, CRYING TO REFEREES🤬😿
POSSIBLE LOCATIONS: PENALTY SPOT🥅
"GIVE ME PENALTY”🤬🤬
"I ONLY STATPAD AGAINST FARMERS MY FRIEND"😁😁
I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application. I asked him to show me his skills and experience, but he just started diving and asking for pens and tap-ins. I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.
What did the racist CoD player say to yo mama?
132.513.531.332
Don't be sad if you miss a shot when you yell "Kobe." He didn't make it either.
Do you play COC?
Because it’s a pretty good game.
Q: What are cheetahs?
A: The worst card players!
I think Kobe misunderstood the 6-ft rule.