Competition

Competition Jokes

Friend

I bet my friend $5 that he would die drowning.

A depressing but satisfying victory.

Transgender People

Why do Republican men hate transgender people?

Because they lost a dick-measuring contest to a ladyboy in Thailand!

Epilepsy

How did the dude with epilepsy win the break dancing competition?

He saw flashing lights.

Life

Friend #1: "Yo guys, what's the most unfair game you've ever played? For me it's Fortnite."

Friend #2: "I'd have to say Monopoly."

Me: "The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it's a one-way game."

Friend #2: "Uhh...that's not exactly what he meant..."

Friend #1: *calls the suicide hotline*

Race

Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?

Because he successfully finished a race!

Football Team

What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?

The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

  • 1
  • Sailing

    The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.

    Guy

    I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.

    "I'm a Paralympian," he replied.

    "Boxing?"

    "No, ... hurdles."

  • 2
  • Event

    Have you heard of the current event in Africa? It’s called the Hunger Games.

    Race

    I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs.

    Gravity sure is fast.

    Priest

    What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?

    They both came in a little behind.

  • 9
  • Bet

    Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet. The loser had to wear their underwear on their pants.