What's the laziest mountain?
Mount Ever-rest.
What's the laziest mountain?
Mount Ever-rest.
So, a man was on a ledge ready to kill himself because he got laid off at work and his girlfriend cheated on him. He was about to jump until he saw from a mountainside a little guy with no arms dancing around. So he thought, "Maybe my life ain't so bad." So he went to the mountainside. "Thank you," he said, "I was gonna jump off a bridge and kill myself until I saw you dancing, even though you have no arms. Dancing?" the armless man said bitterly, "My asshole itches and I can't scratch it."
Why don’t mountains catch colds?
They wear snow caps.
Why are mountains always tired? Because they don't Everest.
How are mountains able to see?
They peak!
What is the most dangerous mountain? Kilimanjaro.
Why are mountains so funny? -- Because they are hill areas.
What do you call a mountain of kittens?
A meowtain.
Why are mountains never serious?
Because they’re hill areas.
Why don’t mountains take things seriously?
Because they’re hill areas.
What mountain cries the most?
A mountain under water.
Why do people laugh at mountains?
Because they're HILLarious!
Why does my dad hate me? Really, please tell me, I'm tired of the constant abuse and pain.
Jesus Christ said my faith can move mountains, so Mohammed said my faith can move skyscrapers.
What YouTube channel did Mt. Fuji subscribe to? Chrissy Man.
Why do mountains never rest?
Because it’s ever-est.
Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “Whatever you wish for comes true once you slide down.” One kid stepped up and slid down. He wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river.
The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money. He then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee!”
How many people can jump higher than a mountain? None. Mountains can't jump.
How do mountains get big?
They go trick-or-treating.
Why did the doctor tell the man to go for a mountain walk?
Alps clear the mind! Haha.