Personal jokes
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
Your mom is so fat that when she stood on a scale, it said, "We need an actual person, not an elephant!"
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
Below I meant to say I set the gay person on fire.
See, this is the best thing about no such thing as vampires because I'd be the first person to say drinks are on me.
Memes
i would try so hard not to laugh if that person was next to me
When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?
When it fails to turn up.
When creating the world, Jesus made the water salty. A person comes up to the water, drinks it, and says: "Why are you so salty?"
What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.
A person with a wheelchair and a football, then they are Rocket League.
I've seen more charisma in a wet mop than in BLESSEDBRIAN'S personality.
Leo might not be the dumbest person in the world... but she’d better hope they don’t DIE!
I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.
A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.
What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.
Kid singing “abcd.”
Person says, “No, no, it’s obcd.”
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
What does a dick and an elderly person have in common? They are both short.
What do you call a fat Chinese person that talks way too much? Panda Express.
Listen, my brothers, if you see a photo of her with another person,
Just go to her house and shoot her with your AK47.
Ok, everyone on this website... I HAVE NO BROTHERS OR SISTERS. The person who claims he's my "brother" is firesharky. He is trying to get fame. Never listen to him. He will lie and trick you to think I have a brother, but I don't.