Personal jokes
What’s the difference from me and a gay person? You.
A "type person" is addicted to eating sugar.
When the doctor saw this, he said,
"From Type 2 Diabetes!"
Get it?
A guy saw a person with a duck and said, "Where did you get a pig?"
The owner replied, "It's not a pig, dummy!"
The random guy said, "I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to the duck."
When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.
You're so skinny you're a thin stick.
You're so fat that when you got in Pacific Ocean, you became the Pacific Ocean.
You're so ugly you got stuff for free.
You're so nasty that when you eat spaghetti, you thought it was throw up.
You're so fat you're the fattest person on Earth.
You are so gay you kissed the boy last night.
When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.
How does a disabled person play chess?
I think you forgot they don't have legs.
Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.
He really shook things up today.
My two moods are “I can’t believe I get to be a person” and “I can’t believe I have to be a person.”
This person ( :I ) It wasn't meant to be a joke; it was just to make space like your mother's ass in space because it's so big.
I was driving a car and a fat person was crossing the street. When I swerved my car to miss her, I ran out of gas.
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
What was the name of the person who was mean?
The Canabully.
You know how girls say, "I would have sex with you if you were the last person on earth"? Well, who's gonna stop me?
Who is this Gwen person?
The reason why you have a high pitched voice is because you always sing opera.
You: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Random person: Why?
You: To get to the idiot's house!
Random person: What?
You: Knock knock.
Random person: Who's there?
You: The chicken.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"
Person: So, Jimmy, what do you do all day?
Jimmy Savile: Anyone who I can do.