I told the last person I slept with I was pregnant. He freaked the fuck out but calmed down after he realized it was April Fools'.
The look on my cousin's face was hilarious.
I asked my friend if he would take a bullet for the last person he slept with.
He said hell yeah, I'd do anything for my sister!
Why did the suicidal person cross the road? He was waiting for a car.
I asked a black man on the street if a white person paints their face black, it’s considered racist, but if a black person paints their face white, will the cops treat them better?
"Oh, you’re still talking? I thought background noise was supposed to fade out after a while. Must be tough waking up every day knowing your personality was a failed experiment."
Why does everyone get offended at female firefighters?
Like seriously, if your house is on fire and burning, you wouldn't really care if the person saving you had a low IQ, right?
Are people too thick to realize the difference between a fruit, a vegetable, and a person?
What do you call a black person?
Dark humor.
What does the EPA issue when a person stinks up a room with their smelly farts?
Air quality alert code brown!
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
Who was the most successful transgender and transracial person in history?
Michael Jackson. He grew up a poor, black boy, and died a rich, white woman.
A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"
If a mentally challenged person shows up late,
Is it ok to call him tardy?
Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a big forehead, and your hairline recedes too.
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?
A KKKO.
What’s the difference between an Indian and Jewish person?
An Indian person is burnt after death.
What’s the difference between my ex and a unicycle?
A unicycle can only take one person at a time.
"9/11" or just "7-Eleven" to a Mexican person.
